2009 in Review...

I saw this on Coach P's blog and thought it would be nice to reflect on the past year. 2009 was good and bad for lots of people and instead of just blogging on and on about the year its nice to have a little focus to reflect on before next year! (its a little long...enjoy!) 


2009 Reflection Questions

1. What was the single best thing that happened this past year?
Falling in love with my best friend. Charlie and I have built an amazing relationship over this past year. We have spent a lot of time apart between his deployment training trips, hunting trips, and other training, not to mention the 5 days a week we spend apart every week. All of our time apart has forced us to really build our communication skills, really talk to each other and get to know each other. I have never spent so much time talking to someone as I have with Charlie. He is truly my best friend and I'm so lucky to have him in my life. 

2. What was the single most challenging thing that happened?
Learning which relationships were worth putting time into, and which ones were sucking me dry. I have never been the type of person to have A LOT of friends, I have always had a few very close friends that I did everything with. This year I realized I was putting a lot of extra time and effort into friendships that were very one sided. I'd only get a phone call when someone wanted a ride somewhere, " lets get together to go to pismo for dinner" actually means, my boyfriend is working in Pismo tonight I want to go visit him but I don't have a car so do you want to drive me and we'll have dinner while we visit him? Or I'd get a phone call when an extra hand was needed at the winery. At first it didn't bother me so much b/c we always had a good time whenever we'd hang out and she is a very sweethearted girl. But then after a while, it seems we'd make plans, and then I'd get flaked on, and I was always the one trying to make the plans, trying to get together for dinner, hang out for drinks, go shopping, and it seemed like it only worked out when she didn't have anything better to do, or we'd make plans and then they'd get cancelled. I realized I was disappointed a lot, so I just stopped trying to make the plans, and now I'm not disappointed, just a little upset b/c I no longer have the friend either. But I guess that's proof that my efforts should go to friends and family that care. It was really hard for me to walk away from that friendship, to stop trying, but I only need people in my life that need me in theirs too.

3. What was an unexpected joy this past year?
Driving became an joy this year. I used to despise driving, used to chat on the phone for the entire 4 hour drive to my parents house just to avoid being alone on the road for that long. But this year in my 25-30 trips to San Diego, I learned to embrace driving, and the time alone. I loved my drive time, 405 traffic and all. I got to collect my thoughts on fridays after work, got to decompress prior to getting to San Diego and spending time with Charlie. I got to listen to what was new on the radio, listen to talk radio, and take in the constant change in sights and sounds in LA. My GPS has a traffic receiver and so "sally" would route me all over LA. I found a beautiful VA cemetery in Los Angeles, drove by dodger stadium during the playoffs, got re-routed through downtown LA, and I now know how to get past that terrible Getty Center traffic! My drives home from San Diego were always pretty painful b/c  it was generally late a night, and I'd just left Charlie, but it gave me time to plan out my next week and think about what was ahead. I guess I learned to value that personal time, and use it to its greatest extent.

4. What was an unexpected obstacle?
I have never had a relationship like mine and Charlie's. And I never knew how it would effect my life. I feel like it is a huge balancing act that I had a hard time balancing this year. My relationship with Charlie has altered my relationship with others. I have focused so much on building my relationship with Charlie, and for a while I didn't realize our relationship had replaced all other relationships in my life. I have had to learn where everyone else now fits in. I turn to Charlie for everything, to talk about frustrations, problems, happiness, work, and life in general. I love that he is there for me for whatever it is that I need. And when you are building a life with someone I believe that it is vital that they are the person you turn to when life throws your curve balls.  Those conversations used to take place with my mom, with my best friend Lisa, with my sister, and with other friends, with whoever I felt like venting to. Now I have those conversations with Charlie, and my relationships with my friends and family have changed. Now I have to work on nurturing my friendships and figuring out how they fit in too. Its nice being able to call my sister just to chat about life, not b/c I'm having an issue or I'm confused about something. I can call my mom to chat about recipes and work. Lisa and I can just catch up on the good things going on in our lives. Of course Lisa and I still gossip about our college days, and call each other when we are having issues in our lives. That's what best friends are for, but lucky for her I now have Charlie to deal with my day to day issues! 


5. Pick three words to describe 2009.
exciting, loving, challenging

6. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe your 2009 (don’t ask them; guess based on how you think your spouse sees you).
stressful, emotional, exhilarating

7. Pick three words your spouse would use to describe their 2009 (again, without asking).
adventurous, passionate, frustrating 

8. What were the best books you read this year?
The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands by Dr. Laura. While it is a bit of preventative maintenance for our relationship, there are a lot of good points that are made in the book. Its made me look at not only my relationship with Charlie but all of my relationships in life. It talks about being a more considerate person, and realizing how your actions affect others. I think everyone could benefit from some self reflection, and this book helped me. 

9. With whom were your most valuable relationships?
Definitely my relationship with Charlie is by far on of my most valuable, and my relationship with my best friend Lisa is also very important to me. My sister and I have finally learned how to be friends over the past few years and it has been so nice, it is one of my most cherished relationship just b/c of how far we have come and how much it has changed and developed. 

10. What was your biggest personal change from January to December of this past year?
Making the time to take care of myself. I treat myself terribly, I don't eat as good as I should, I don't take the time to work out as much as I want, I don't grocery shop enough, and I don't do laundry often enough. Bottom line I don't take good care of myself. I have put a lot of effort into myself this last month, mainly b/c I have the time, and my focus has been on keeping myself busy. I decided not to "get a hobby" during Charlie's deployment, but rather focus on taking better care of myself. 


11. In what way(s) did you grow emotionally?
I learned to let someone in. I let Charlie break down every last wall I had built up around my heart. I used to be very guarded, I would let people in, but only so far. This year I learned to trust, learned what a healthy, supportive relationship feels like. And I learned how to break down the barriers I had built up to keep people out. 

12. In what way(s) did you grow spiritually?
I have never been a church going person. I was baptized as a child, and then never went to church after that. But I have always believed, and I have always prayed in my own way. I have always believed that everything happens for a reason, and that what happens is God's will. I have a sense of calm with Charlie's deployment and I think it is b/c I have had to grasp onto my own spirituality. My calm comes from knowing that God is watching over him, that there is not a thing I can do to keep him safe, that I can pray for his safe return, but in the end, it is God's will. It is that thought that has kept me from worrying myself sick. I can pray for a safe return, but worrying about all of the terrible things that could happen over the next six months doesn't do anyone any good, when in the end, everything happens for a reason, and worrying doesn't help anything. 

13. In what way(s) did you grow physically?
Besides gaining 10 lbs? In the last month my muscles have grown! I have started a new workout program that I love, and its working! While I haven't lost much weight, I can definitely see a little more tone to my muscles! yay! 

14. In what way(s) did you grow in your relationships with others?
Mine and Charlie's relationship grows every day! And it gets better every day. Our time apart truly has made us stronger, and I appreciate the little things so much more b/c of the challenges Charlie and I have faced. Also, my brother and I have grown in our relationship. He's been in Korea this whole year and we have relied heavily on technology  to communicate as much as possible. It has taken a lot of effort to nurture that relationship, and its been worth it. 

15. What was the most enjoyable area of managing your home?
I don't put any effort into managing my home, my room is a mess almost always b/c I only use it to as a place to lay my head. But my favorite thing is clean sheets. I love having clean sheets, but I hate making my bed!! I'm also not a big fan of laundry, but when I get it all together and get energy, generally on a weekend, and I put on new sheets, I LOVE IT! 

16. What was your most challenging area of home management?
Keeping my room clean.  I don't know why its so hard to keep laundry in the laundry basket, to do my laundry regularly enough, to throw away things that aren't needed. I feel like my room is full of clutter, piles of laundry that need to be done, I have a box of cut up boxes that need to be taken to the recycling, pure laziness I suppose. It is my new years resolution to keep it all together this year, to get a schedule to my chores, maybe a good ol' fashioned chore chart? Or at least a list of things I want to get done weekly! 

17. What was your single biggest time waster in your life this past year?
well besides driving...I spent soooooo much time on the road this year, I put 35,000 miles on my truck this year, which may not sound like much but I only put 45,000 miles total on it the first 3 1/2 years I owned it. I commute 70 miles round trip a day to/from work, and then 500 miles round trip on my weekends for driving. Now I'm not saying the destinations weren't worth the trips, but no one should spend that many hours in their vehicle! And that's going to change next year! No more long distance! yay! 


As far as wasted time though, I'd definitely say facebook. Its a mental escape for me, I facebook when I get home from work and just escape reality for a bit. Nothing productive gets done, its a total wast of time, but I'm ok with that, everyone needs their own release! 


18. What was the best way you used your time this past year?
My weekends with Charlie was the most rewarding use of my time this past year. Spending quality time with a person you love is heartwarming and fun and all the stress of life just disappeared when I was with Charlie. My weekends with Charlie made my days at work pass by faster as I always had something to look forward to! Cultivating that relationship has been so rewarding and has added so much to my life. 


19. What was the biggest thing you learned this past year?
I've learned to let go of relationships that don't benefit me, relationships that suck me dry and don't give me any happiness. I've learned to only let people into my life that need me in theirs, and to cherish those friendships, as they are the most precious relationships one could ask for. 


20. Create a phrase or statement that describes 2009 for you.
2009 has laid the foundation for an amazing future!

Skype!

Hope everyone had a great Christmas! I just arrived back at my house in SLO and this year's Christmas was soooo different for me! To name a few, my parents moved into a new house, so everything just seemed off, eating at a new dinning room table, where do you sit? Christmas tree and stockings in the same room, that's a new one! My sister, brother in law, nephew and older brother all decided to slumber party at my parents for the first time in 12 years.... odd seeing as my sister lives 5 minutes down the street! Then there was the fact that it's the first Christmas in 20 years that my brother wasn't there.... and that's where Skype comes in! 

I love skype! I used it when I was in Australia to simply call home, didn't use the video chat stuff, just a very cheap calling system while I was studying abroad. My brother skyped us, via video chat during christmas so he got to "be there" while we opened christmas presents and stockings. I was also able to take him out to his truck to hear the new speakers and amp his buddy James and I had installed on Christmas eve. He said it was great to be able to see us, and what we got for christmas, and to see my nephew opening presents and playing with the paper and bows!

Not only did I get to skype my brother over Christmas, Charlie was able to give me the best Christmas present of the year.... he stumbled across a wireless internet connection and we got to skype too!!! FOR HOURS!!! It came up Christmas eve at about 2 am my time, and Char texted me to say he had wireless and wanted to skype, we chatted for 2 hours that night and it was soooo special. It was so amazing to see him, to see his face, his smile, his reactions to our conversations, to see him laugh and be goofy! I've gotten to  chat with him a lot more than I thought I would this deployment, but to actually see him was the best thing ever. Charlie had wireless for 2-3 days and I'd say we probably video chatted via skype for a good 8-10 hours. It was so nice to see his face and have some really good conversations with him, and it was semi private b/c he was in a neighboring tent, not at the big communications center! We talked about anything and everything and it was so reassuring and heart warming. 

Charlie has since lost that wireless connection, but I sure hope it comes back again real soon. Until then it will be letters, e-mails and phone calls, and lots of prayers that wireless comes back! 

Puppies

I know I haven't written in a while.... lacking motivation, mixed with Christmas chaos, and an eye infection just haven't added up to blogging. But I figured tonight is the lag night between work, working out, and the beginning of a whirl wind trip home for the holidays! I'm excited to be headed home to Elk Grove for Christmas, its my mom's favorite holiday and I'm looking forward to some quality time with the family.

I told my mom last week that I wanted there to be a puppy at her house when I got there. I've been missin my pup Riley a lot. He used to live with me, then I moved to a house that didn't allow dogs and my parents adopted him for me! He was about 3 years old when we put him down this past summer. Poor little guy had either a brain tumor or neurological disease. Either way he had a stroke and wasn't going to recover. Even though I only got to see him when I came home to visit family, he was a great companion! He could hear my truck before I pulled into our neighborhood, and wouldn't let me out of his site the entire time I was home. When I started packing my bags to leave, he'd conveniently unpack them for me. As I tried to leave the house he would wrap his paws around me and try to keep me from leaving. I always though I'd move into a new house soon and he'd be able to come live with me again. I miss that little guy.

Dogs have an uncanny ability to listen without judgement they just cuddle, and dry your tears, and nuzzle against you as you pour your heart out. I worked out some of my most difficult times with Riley simply b/c there were things I needed to get off my chest and just say out loud and I just needed to cry. Its no fun to cry painful tears for any reason, but its worse to cry them alone, or feel like you're being judged as you cry around friends or family(I guess I just don't like crying in front of people period) Puppies have the ability to listen and not say a word, and it is one of their best traits.

Although I'm not sure all dogs are this nurturing... I'm pretty sure Charlie's dog Robbie is WAY too hyperactive to be a very good listener. He tries so hard to manage his ADD and his obedience its comical. When Charlie gets him out on the OB course he's soooo excited he's jumping for joy he just wants to run and jump and tunnel and run some more! But if you try and get him to stop in the middle of an A-frame and sit on each step, or lay down at the top, he is on edge, he wants to obey the command and  at the same time his mind is already down the other side of the ramp and over the next jump and you can see that anticipation in him its sooo funny! But that kind of dog is perfect for Charlie, he likes dogs that serve a purpose, they perform a specific task, specifically hunting dogs in is home life, and working military dogs in his professional life. The idea of a dog that cuddles and is a companion is a little beyond what Charlie wants in a dog. I'm not saying I would like my next dog to be little fluffy tea cup chihuahua or anything, I mean Riley was a 65 lb border collie/pit bull/McNabb mix. Maybe a good mix of mine and Charlie's ideal dog would be a cattle dog, they are working dogs, and at the same time, they are extremely loyal and great companions! I predict a very long debate prior to Charlie and I actually deciding on a breed! All I know is I could sure use a puppy around these days....

Christmas Parties...

Today was my work Christmas Party. Well technically it was my branch's little celebration, we had a secret santa gift exchange and pizza, not quite the extravagant bank wide party they had last year, but we made the most of it! I'm kinda happy that we didn't have a big bank party this year, actually makes the holidays a little bit easier b/c its one less thing that Charlie won't be able to make it to.
During our bank shindig tonight I missed 4 text messages from Charlie and my heart sank. Luckily the last one said that he'd call soon, and I made sure I didn't miss that call! Charlie and I were chatting tonight about the things we were going to miss, besides the obvious Christmas and New Years, there's our one year anniversary. I haven't had a one year anniversary with anyone since high school, and we all know that doesn't really count! Christmas will be rough, New Years is no big deal b/c I don't generally do anything, and I think Valentines Day is just silly, but an anniversary, that's something special, that's just ours so, I'm sure we will find some way to make it special, even if we are half a world away from each other!
I've gotten to talk with Charlie kind of a lot these last couple days! It sooo nice to hear his voice and chat with him about his day. It makes it feel like any other day for us, asking how work was, how the day went,  what we are up to the rest of the week. Charlie is doing well, he's getting a little frustrated that he's not going out on missions yet. In some ways it doesn't bother me much that he's staying on base, but at the same time, if he's going to be half a world away he might as well be doing what he went there to do, cause if he's not then he should be home! Charlie also wanted me to pass along that he has enough baby wipes to last 12 deployments, so thank you to those who have sent care packages with them, but he now has enough of a supply to last though this deployment and his first born... haha!

Weekends

This is my second weekend without Charlie and it all just seems so odd. I didn't do much of anything this weekend, relaxed, did laundry, a little Christmas shopping, dinner with the roomie and her b/f, nothing all too exciting and I feel like such a bum. I mean I did my workout, I got Christmas shopping done, went grocery shopping, cleaned up my house a bit, but for some reason I still feel pretty lazy. And the crazy thing is that when Charlie was here, we would spend ALL day laying on the couch watching Dexter or Weeds, or some other instant Netfix movie. We'd get up to eat something, and then lay back on the couch and watch another movie, our weekends were the exact definition of lazy and I loved it! We'd talk and laugh and just simply enjoy each other's company. 

We keep talking about how things would be different if I lived down there. The talk always starts with the debate on who would get annoyed with who first followed by all the fun things we would do with our weekends! We'd have our nights after work to be lazy and watch movies and on our weekends we could do all kinds of fun stuff.... we could go camping, spend a weekend in Jullian, go sailing, kayaking, spend a weekend in 29 palms with Morris and Tammy... and the list goes on and on. As it is now, we only really have a full day and a half together every 5 days and all that stuff seems like too much to do in such a short period! Don't get me wrong, we go out on adventures sometimes, we've been the the San Diego Zoo, the Wild Animal Park, took a day trip up to Jullian in the rain, spent a weekend at Disneyland, visited 29 palms, and even road tripped to Wyoming for 4th of July. I guess its been the last few months that we started stayin in on the weekends. Maybe its b/c we knew deployment was coming up and we wanted to spend every last minute possible together just enjoying each others company. Whatever the reason was, I miss my lazy weekends with Charlie! 

I did do a couple fun things this weekend, I wandered Borders for an hour today, just walking around trying to find something new to read, like I don't have a bookshelf here full right? There was one book that caught my eye, Charlie has been telling me for months now that I should pick it up and give it a read, a little preventative maintenance I suppose. Its a book by Dr. Laura called "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" If you don't know who Dr. Laura is, she's a radio talk show host/psychotherapist that deals with relationship issues. Her philosophy is that men a very simple creatures and need very little to keep them happy. When I listen to her I agree with nearly everything she says, and Charlie has listened to her for years. Basically it all comes down to the fact that 99% of women ignore the very simple needs of their men, and that causes major issues in relationships. The last thing I would ever want to do would be to ignore Charlie's needs, or to not nurture our relationship properly, so I picked up the book and will add it to my reading list over the next couple of months. Hopefully I will learn something fun! I also finished week 2 of my workout program and I am still loving it! I'm waiting till I move on to phase 2 before I check all my measurements and weight and bodyfat and all that jazz, but my unofficial weigh in today says I've lost 5% body fat in the past two weeks! yay me!! Not the most exciting of weekends, but its one more down!!! only 26(ish) left... but who's counting right? haha!

Under the Dome

I once again wasn't planning on writing tonight. I had just finished telling my roommate that while it was nice that one of my lenders asked how Charlie was doing and what's the latest I'd heard from him, I'd been trying all day not to think about the fact that I haven't talked to him since Monday morning! And then I'm on f-book chat talkin to by good friend Kara and up pops a chat from Charlie!!I was pretty ecstatic to hear from him! So we chatted on f-book for a couple minutes and then he called to catch up on life. It was so good to talk to him. He's doing well, feeling better! Not sure if I mentioned or not, but he had a bit of a cold for a few days there, but it sounds like he kicked it finally! He's been busy working with Robbie, and its been raining a lot there, kinda like it has been here! He's been reading the new Stephen King book Under the Dome and he loves it. He tries to ready 25-50 pages a day and he's about 300 pages in, which is a pretty decent dent into a 1100 page book. He likes reading though says it keeps his brain working and makes him use his imagination. He also said its a good way to keep him busy! He has a couple family friends that are planning on sending him a care package with a whole series of books, so he should be set for the reading department for a while! I don't think I've ever dated someone who loves reading as much as I do, or really, who likes reading at all. I love to read, and I read a whole variety of things from murder mystery novels by Stewart Woods and James Patterson (some of my favs!!) to love stories and drama, and sometimes I'll even read non-fiction if I'm feelin the topic. I have read every single Nicholas Sparks book, except the new one sitting on my shelf that I'm overly excited to start this weekend, and I've read every single Jodi Picoult book.... she is an amazing author. I also love books that come in series (women's murder club, Stone Barrington, the Orchid series, mainly by James Patterson and Stewart Woods) they are easy reads b/c you already know the characters and personalities! Basically, I love most books that are an easy ready with a good story line, which pretty much exempts all the books I had to read in high school and college, glad those days are over! Speaking of college being over, this weekend is Grad Weekend here at Cal Poly. And I wouldn't even have known that except for the fact that a girl who used to be one of my good friends sent me an announcement that she's graduation on Saturday! It made me realize that friendships take work, and they require work from both sides. And if it means something to you, both sides generally put in the effort. I don't have a lot of girlfriends so I always tried to put in a little extra effort with the ones I do have, but with this one, I got tired of being the one putting in the effort, trying to make plans and figure out schedules and only being called when I was needed for something...I know that I have not picked up the phone in 4 months to call her, but on the same token, I haven't heard my phone ringing either. Kind of a bummer huh? But on a happy note....CONGRATS to all of the winter grads!! You should have stayed in school through spring, the real world isn't all its cracked up to be!!! 

Feelin Better...

I've been having a hard time these past couple days motivating myself to write, so I just haven't written! But I got some stuff in the mail today and its motivated me to vent a little! My motivation to write came b/c I got our pictures from the Ball in the mail today!!!!! And, I also got a card I sent to Charlie returned to me b/c they wanted more postage..... I've just about had it with the darn post office!!!!! Its a card, I put a stamp on it, they sent it back to me and asked for 20 cents more!! I don't get it but I will take it into the post office tomorrow and figure out just why I need to pay more! It seems I've been taking the good with the bad lately!

I got to talk to Charlie for over an hour this past weekend and it was awesome, but I haven't heard from him since Monday morning, which really isn't that long, but I miss his voice. I have not missed a workout since I started my new program, but I strained my hamstring. I mailed out all my Christmas presents to Charlie and a few others, but I spent over an hour at the post office attempting to get those packages out (how many darn forms do you really need to fill out to get christmas presents to afghanistan!?!?!) Add to that the silly customs forms make you line item everything that's in the box... makes opening Christmas presents real exciting... why even wrap them!? grrrrrrr!! not a happy camper! And on top of that I've been missing Charlie....A LOT...

I try not to write when I'm missing Charlie b/c I know everyone else is missing him too and has days like mine that come up, and I don't want to bring someone else down if they are having a good day. I came home from work yesterday and I was all flustered with the post office and I had to work late and I all really wanted was a hug from Charlie. His hugs always make me feel better, and they are what I miss the most when he's gone. Its such a simple thing, but its so comforting and calming!

Today was better than the last couple. I was so excited to get our pictures from the ball, they turned out pretty good! And today was the Christmas Luncheon held by the Chamber which was a great event to break up the flustering day we were having at work. And I have two new Christmas CDs to add to my iPod that I'm currently uploading to iTunes. All in all it looks like the rest of the week is looking up... and if not, well I have plenty of good Christmas music to listen to and my brother just posted a hilarious video from youtube that makes my sides hurt from laughing so hard.... check it out... fair warning its a little crude... but funny...

Christmas Cards...

Christmas has always been one of my favorite times of the year. I love the decorations, the music, the christmas cheer, the good spirits most people are in when the are out and about doing Christmas shopping, I even love the grinches that want to be anywhere else but wandering around Best Buy trying to figure out what to get their bratty niece. I love trying to find that perfect gift for someone, putting in some real thought as to what they might like or want.

This year I've done pretty good on the Christmas shopping, I have Charlie's stuff all done and ready to wrap and send off this week. I have my sister, her husband and my older brother and dad all done. All I have left is my mom, my little bro (who I will probably do the shopping for during day after x-mas sales since he's in Korea and we aren't sending him big gifts over there) and then there's my nephew. I have no idea what to get my nephew. I got him something for his birthday that I thought he'd love to play with, but it was taken back and he got a life vest instead (wonder if he ever wore it or if he outgrew it? hmm?) But anyways, I'll probably just get a gift certificate for that little guy and then he can get whatever mom wants him to have! He's only 1 1/2 anyways so he won't know the difference.

Oh I almost forgot, I've also got all my ornaments bought! My mom buys ornaments every year for all of us, and then I buy the ones for her. So I have gone to Hallmark and bought all my ornaments, and as always I picked a couple up for myself too! But I must say, I'm pretty disappointed in Hallmark these days.

While at Hallmark I tried to find cards to send over to my brother in Korea, Charlie in Afghanistan, and then a few other cards to send to the troops for guys that may not have much family and may not get much mail. Well let me tell you, Hallmark has 1.... yes ONE... Christmas card for military members serving overseas. You can get cards for your mail man, your cable service provider, your dentist, your teacher, your PG&E meter reader, your newspaper delivery boy, or your dog walker, but if you want to send a card to a military member putting their life on the line for their country, you have one option and its so generic its not even worth spending the money on. With so many troops deployed to war zones, and others stationed across the world, you would think that there would be cards year around to send to say thank you, but especially at Christmas time, when these men and women are a half a world away from their friends, family, and loved ones. You think a company who created Valentines Day, could figure out the demand and the market for saying thank you to our troops?

1 week down...

It has been a week now since Charlie left, and I can't figure out if its going by fast or slow. On Wednesday it felt like the week was dragging on, and then all day Thursday I thought it was Wednesday and it didn't feel like the next day should be Friday, but now the weekend is here, and it definitely feels like a weekend, but it feels so odd. This is the first weekend in 6 weeks that I have not driven down to San Diego, and the first weekend in 10 weeks that I haven't spent with Charlie. He and I have been together since January and either he or I have driven to see each other nearly every single weekend since then. He has been on a couple different training trips that have taken him away for a couple weeks at a time, and he went hunting for a couple weeks in Wyoming, but other than that I have spend every weekend for the past 10 months with him. Right now this just feels like another training mission, like he's out in the field running tracks for a few days, and I guess in a way he is.

This is his job, and a job he loves more than anyone I've ever known has loved a job. And his job requires travel, whether that be desert training in Fort Irwin, pre-deployment training in Yuma, cross training with Special Forces in Hawthorne, or deployments, travel is part of the gig. I know when this seven months has past and we are watching fireworks on the 4th of July (trying to be optimistic he'll be home by then!) I will say that the time flew by. I really do think it will fly by.

I'm doing lots to keep me busy while he's away, and its doesn't take much effort. Work has turned up the heat and gotten extra busy at we approach year end so that takes up a good 11 hours of my day between getting ready for work, commuting 70 miles round trip, and working a 9 hour day. And then I get home around 6 p.m. and I work out, eat dinner, shower and repeat for the next four days! Pretty simple! And the weekends for the next few weeks are pretty self explanatory.... CHRISTMAS SHOPPING!! I did some today actually, and after getting it home and thinking about it, I'm taking half of it back tomorrow! Good thing I started a little early!

I got to talk to Charlie for about an hour tonight. I'm such a lucky girl! It was so nice to sit and chat with him for that long. We had lots to catch up on since we haven't talked since Monday. He was telling me about the breakfast he had this morning.... fresh kiwi and melon, an omelet with all the veggies and sausage, and waffles. Now I'm not sure where they are finding fresh melon and kiwi in 50 degree weather, but I'm so glad they are! I know all I could find for fresh fruit at the market this week was apples and grapes! He also said he's been taking 4-5 hour walks with Robbie to get him used to all the smells and sites where they are at. Helps Charlie to find his way around the base, gets them both some exercise, and keeps Robbie workin that sniffer of his! They are still waiting around to find out when they will get to go out on missions, but in the mean time the are setting up their kennels and trying to get their own office with computers and phones set up. Other than that he said there not a whole lot too exciting going on over there right now (besides the amazing food open 24 hours a day), just getting in training and waiting to go out.

1 week down.... 29 to go!!

Camouflage and Christmas Lights

I wasn't going to write tonight. I'm tired, and sore from this new workout program I started, and I didn't have much to say anyways. But on my way home from dinner with my co-workers, I heard this song, and I got a little bit inspired. Add to that Charlie and I got to e-mail back and forth a little bit tonight. He's doing well and getting all settled in still. There is a little story about the song Camouflage and Christmas; I heard it for the first time last Saturday driving home from Camp Pendleton.

 In saying good-bye to Charlie, I only shed a tear or two.  Now don't think I'm emotionless, we all know that's not true, I think it was a bit easier for me than some b/c I say good-bye to him every weekend. I spend 5 nights a week getting by on phone call and text messages. I heard this song about an hour into my drive home from San Diego last week, and the reality of this next 7 months hit me like a ton of bricks and the water works came through the last lines of this song... I think the reason this song hit me so hard was b/c it made it real, it brought everything into prospective. It not a sad song, it's just real and now listening to it makes me smile, and tear up at the same time. I'm not posting this to upset anyone, but between Charlie being away, and my brother stationed in Korea and missing his first christmas, I realized this song can touch so many people. I hope you can come to enjoy it as much as I do...

Camouflage And Christmas Light...

Moto Mail

Before Charlie left for Afghanistan he handed me a big packet of information from the family readiness office that was directed towards spouses. It had all kinds of random information in it regarding paying off accounts, storing vehicles, powers of attorney and other paperwork I didn't really want to think about him having to complete before going on deployment. I read through most of it this week and came across one item that was pretty awesome, it was a flyer for a website called MotoMail.

MotoMail gives you the ability to type a letter to a Marine stationed in Afghanistan and then when you are done you hit submit, the letter is physically printed in Afghanistan, put into an envelope and delivered via regular mail. Its not quite as personal as a hand written letter, but its quicker, and it will get to the Marine even when they may not have access to internet for e-mails.

The website is http://www.motomail.us. I sent a letter to Charlie just a couple hours ago, so we'll see if he gets it soon. The army website, http://www.army.mil featured an article on a very similar program that gets mail to soldiers in Afghanistan and the article says that mail will be delivered in 1-4 days and sometimes that same day. You can also send pictures and they will print the pictures. Motomail has the ability to send mail to any service member stationed in a Marine Corp unit in Afghanistan.  The best part about this service is not only is it fast and convenient, IT'S FREE! For security reasons I can not post Charlie's address on here, but if you would like it send me and e-mail or leave a comment and I will be sure to get it to you!

Telephone Romeo...

I woke up at midnight to my phone vibrating from an e-mail from Charlie. I e-mailed him back as quick as I could in hopes that he just might call... and he did! We got to chat for a whole 15 minutes! It was so good to hear his voice and know he was doing well. He can write all the e-mails telling me he's doing good, but nothing is like hearing it in his voice. It was so nice to chat with him, we caught up on lots of random stuff! Apparently his dog, Robbie, does not like to fly and had an upset tummy for the first couple days and had to sleep outside alone, which he also didn't like, he barked all night long. If you've met Robbie you know he has severe ADHD as well as even worse separation anxiety, so sleeping outside alone while the other dogs and marines were inside did not make him very happy!

Charlie said he's stationed at a temporary place for now. They are in the process of replacing the team of dogs and handlers that are currently on base there, and in the interim they are at their temporary location. He says its nice, they have 5 guys to a room and the dogs stay with them. Right now they are just getting training on the ins and outs of "going off wire" or going on missions. He thinks missions will start later this week or next. In the meantime they have their classes, the gym, work with the dogs, and continue to get all settled. I asked him about the weather over there, he said its a typical desert, hot during the day and cold at night. He also said that the only thing he forgot was a shower towel, but he could always use more of Dad's jerky!

Charlie is doing well and he sounds happy, and he's excited to be where he's at and to use the training he has received. I know he's in a scary place with hostile people, but I try, for him, not to let it worry me. We talked a lot before he left about me worrying, and he straight up asked me not to worry, not to think about all of the scary stuff, b/c all of that scary stuff is out of my hands, its out of his hands, and its decided by someone higher up. He asked me not to worry b/c it doesn't do anyone any good, it would upset me being pessimistic and thinking of all the worst case scenarios, and me being upset and scared and worrying would weigh him down so much. So far I have not let my mind even wander to the pessimistic side of things. I have been able to keep a positive attitude and a smile on my face. I look forward to every e-mail and try to make sure he always wakes up to a new piece of reading material from me. And I keep my phone on loud waiting for the next call from my telephone romeo....

Telephone Romeo - Jason Boland...

The Little Things...

Ok, so it's official I have become one of those people who carry their phone around with them EVERYWHERE!!! I mean I don't leave my desk at work without it in my hand, whether I'm getting a glass of water, eating lunch or even going to the bathroom, I keep it with me. I can only imagine how upset I would be if I missed a phone call, I even had my phone in arms reach when I was in the shower! (pathetic much?) But let me say, I'm sooo ok with being pathetic it doesn't bother me one bit, because the second that phone vibrates or rings with a new e-mail or call, I'm the happiest girl in the world!

Charlie e-mailed me today. He made it safe and sound to Camp Leatherneck. He said he was able to get some sleep on the plane, which I find hard to believe, between mid-air refueling, 15 smelly loud dogs, 15 anxious Marines, and turbulence, sleeping couldn't have been easy! We bought him a few books before he left and he finished The Road before even landing in Afghanistan.  Luckily we also got him the new Stephen King book and its about 4 inches thick so that should keep him busy for a few weeks!

Charlie wanted to be sure I passed on that he is doing well and he's settling in. He also wanted to pass along that "the chow here is amazing!"

I have always said that its is the little things in life that make me the happiest. When Charlie was state-side it would be random text or e-mail that would make my day, or him showing up in town at 3:00 when I thought he wasn't leaving base until 4:00, a back massage after a long drive down to San Diego. He can always find new little ways to surprise me and make me feel like the luckiest girl in the world, and its no surprise that he can do that from half way across the world. His e-mail tonight was the first I've received since he landed in Afghanistan, and in a short e-mail he was able to make me smile and warm my heart.

Whirl Wind...

Well it has absolutely been a whirl wind couple of weeks. I was lucky enough between vacation days, holidays, and personal time to get to spend 17 of the last 27 days with Charlie and his family! It was sooo nice to get to spend all of that time with him, it was a crazy couple of weeks but we packed it full of good memories!

Veterans day fell on a wednesday this year and the Marine Corp Ball on that friday, so naturally I took off thursday and friday and made an extra long weekend of it! During the week we got Charlie's apartment all packed up and then there was the ball on Friday. The ball was an amazing event, not as good as some in the past according to Charlie, but still so much fun. Here are a couple pictures:

Charlie and his buddy Ty

Every girl should go to a ball! I'm looking forward to next year's!

This weekend kept getting better b/c while we were getting ready to head to the ball, Charlie's brother Victor and his wife Dani came into town to spend the weekend with us! It was sooo nice of them to fly out for the weekend and we had a lot of fun. I think the most entertaining moment was the boys wrestling in the ocean after breakfast, which of course I did not get any pictures of! grrr!

Thanks for coming out guys, it was a fun weekend!!

The following weekend was just as good! We all thought it was going to be the weekend that Charlie deployed. He was scheduled to leave Sunday the 22nd and we were all busy preparing ourselves for that event! Charlie's parents and sister and family friend Mike came out to spend that last weekend with Charlie and it meant a lot to him to have his family close.

We went to the beach, had some AMAZING sushi, made one last trip to the rooster, and got Charlie all packed up and ready to go!

And packed he stayed for another week b/c deployment got pushed back to Saturday after Turkey Day which was good and not so good all at the same time! Being pushed back meant Charlie was able to spend Thanksgiving here rather than in an airport hanger, but the guys were so ready to just get on the plane and go you could tell they were disappointed to have it pushed back. Thanksgiving was extra special this year for me b/c I got to spend it with Charlie and some of my closest friends. My best friend Lisa invited us to spend Thanksgiving with them up here in Paso Robles and it was quite the event! There was so much food Charlie and I ate ourselves sick.... like really sick! But the food and the company were amazing and made our first Thanksgiving together truly something to give thanks about.

Charlie deployed yesterday. It was hard to watch, hard to go through the goodbyes, but what made it sooo much easier was how excited he is to be going. And its not just him, its the whole detachment that is going. They are a great group of guys and they are all very excited to get over there and use the training and skills that they have been working on and developing over the last couple years. Here are a couple pictures from they day they left:

Final words from the Major before the boys left, he says that there are 45 guys on the backside ready to support the families, wives, girlfriends, and loved ones so that the Marines can focus on doing their job on the front side.

Gunny checking all Marines and their issued gear prior to loading up.

Saying out last good-byes and I love yous before loading up and shipping out! I think we said "I love you" and "see you when you get back" about 4 times before they actually pulled out of the parking lot!

Two vans, to trucks, and two trailers to get 15 marines, 15 dogs and all of their gear to March AFB.

Charlie left Camp Pendleton at 9:45 Saturday morning, got to March at 11:00am and flew out of March at 5:00pm. I just got an e-mail from him this morning at 7:30. He landed in Germany, and they were getting ready to take off again. They are off to Afghanistan, and I'm looking forward to the next update from him!

Start from the beginning...

So, blogging is really not my thing... I tried to do it while I was living in Australia and I failed miserably, but I'm going to give it another shot!

The idea of blogging came when I was making a very long list of things I'm going to do over the next 7 months to keep me busy! One Marine's wife suggested blogging b/c that way everyone can read up on how Charlie is doing, what he needs, how he's feeling, without having to make 200 phone calls after a 3 minute conversation. I decided to take her advice and try it out! I will of course be making lots and lots of phone calls to friends and family over the next few months, but I figure this is great way to keep everyone in the loop! I also wanted to do this for Charlie so when he gets the chance to hop on the internet, he can check in on what's going on back home. And I also thought it would be fun for us to read through it once he gets home!

I don't know what this blog is going to morph into.... a journal? reports from the field? An open forum for family and friends? But I suppose that is the exciting thing about starting one of these!

I hope to get feedback, and comments and messages from friends and family, and I hope that you share this blog with anyone who may want to read!